Knock, Knock. Who's there? Shoes in the lunchbox!

I woke up today mentally immobile. Still, I got up. My kid wanted to go to preschool so I brushed my teeth, got dressed and went downstairs to make her some breakfast and a snack for school.

She was still in her pyjamas. She was playing an elaborate imagination game.

I opened the fridge. No milk, no butter, no peanut butter. She was tired of porridge and didn't want plain bread.

An apple for breakfast and an orange for snack.

My feel were cold as I sat down and checked my e-mail to see if there were any preschool related messages. I hate not knowing what's going on when I get there. It feels like I've been caught on the toilet or something. I'd missed the parent meeting last night and am on the hook for some major things. I'm so stressed out.

I check the weather. Minus thirty-two celsius. I don't want to go outside. Preschool has commenced and we are still at home, not ready to leave. It takes twenty times longer to get ready to go outside in this weather than it does in the summer.

I'm half into my first boot when my daughter decides she needs to put her shoes in her lunchbox, which has a childproof latch so I have to open it for her. She also needs a separate bag for her orange and another bag to put the bag and lunchbox into. I imagine being at preschool, late, and taking off all her winter layers, hearing the other children inside the room, and then being required to open the lunchbox to get the indoor shoes. I lose it. I lose whatever shred of motivation I had to self-sacrifice so my daughter could have what she wanted.

We'll never make it in time. Sorry, sweetie, we can't go.

I take off my half-on boot and try to keep my child safe as she tantrums back into the living room in utter devastation. She's shattered. No preschool? She begs and pleads, screaming and crying. Pleeeaase, mama!! Please can I go!!!

My guilt sets in.

Then, my self-defense. But she's the one who took so long to get dressed. She's the one who was playing and not getting into her snow pants. She's the one who got so easily distracted by bags and lunchbox. She's the one who's in preschool.

My guilt returns. I'm the parent.

I'm so sorry I didn't move faster today, kid. I'm sorry you missed preschool. We'll get there on Wednesday, I promise. Do you want to see something cool?

I distract her to take the edge off our collective disappointment. She's already forgotten. Children are resilient. I'm ready to go back to bed and stay there until she's of legal age. I'll have to settle for some manic housecleaning, a pair of slippers and maybe an apple, too.

Photo Shoot!

My mom bought these tres adorable outfits for the girls. We did a photo shoot in our living room (great lighting) with Annand's very awesome camera (he fancies himself an amateur photographer). Here are our faves.

Here are some recent ones...

Here are some recent photos for you. The sisters are starting to get along and play together more. They are also having sibling squabbles already as well! That one of the four of us was on our "winter vacation!" We actually have not had a vacation in a really long time, as Annand's job has been keeping him quite busy. As a way of regaining some sanity, I devised a plan to go out for lunch before we had to take him to work. We pretended, from the moment we got our winter coats on, that we were not in Edmonton, and that we were really on vacation. We had some wine with our lunch, Makeba had fancy hot cocoa with homemade marshmallows. I don't remember what Althea had, she wasn't eating that much at the time. She may have had a teething biscuit. All in all, it was a successful one hour vacation. We felt minutely refreshed, but refreshed nonetheless.